Mothers...

Someone on one of The Bump forums posted this tonight.

Mothers-

This is for the mothers who have sat up all night with sick toddlers in their arms, wiping up barf laced with Oscar Mayer wieners and cherry Kool-Aid saying, "It's okay honey, Mommy's here." Who have sat in rocking chairs for hours on end soothing crying babies who can't be comforted.

This is for all the mothers who show up at work with spit-up in their hair and milk stains on their blouses and diapers in their purse. For all the mothers who run carpools and make cookies and sew Halloween costumes. And all the mothers who DON'T.

This is for the mothers who gave birth to babies they'll never see. And the mothers who took those babies and gave them homes.

This is for the mothers whose priceless art collections are hanging on their refrigerator doors.
And for all the mothers who froze their buns on metal bleachers at football or soccer games instead of watching from the warmth of their cars, so that when their kids asked, "Did you see me, Mom?" they could say, "Of course, I wouldn't have missed it for the world," and mean it.

This is for all the mothers who yell at their kids in the grocery store and swat them in despair when they stomp their feet and scream for ice cream before dinner. And for all the mothers who count to ten instead, but realize how child abuse happens.

This is for all the mothers who sat down with their children and explained all about making babies. And for all the (grand) mothers who wanted to, but just couldn't find the words.

This is for all the mothers who go hungry, so their children can eat. For all the mothers who read "Goodnight, Moon" twice a night for a year. And then read it again. "Just one more time."

This is for all the mothers who taught their children to tie their shoelaces before they started school. And for all the mothers who opted for Velcro instead.

This is for all the mothers who teach their sons to cook and their daughters to sink a jump shot.

This is for every mother whose head turns automatically when a little voice calls "Mom?" in a crowd, even though they know their own offspring are at home -- or even away at college.

This is for all the mothers who sent their kids to school with stomach aches assuring them they'd be just FINE once they got there, only to get calls from the school nurse an hour later asking them to please pick them up. Right away.

This is for mothers whose children have gone astray, who can't find the words to reach them.

This is for all the step-mothers who raised another woman's child or children, and gave their time, attention, and love... sometimes totally unappreciated!

For all the mothers who bite their lips until they bleed when their 14-year-olds dye their hair green.

For all the mothers of the victims of recent school shootings, and the mothers of those who did the shooting.

For the mothers of the survivors, and the mothers who sat in front of their TVs in horror, hugging their child who just came home from school, safely.

This is for all the mothers who taught their children to be peaceful, and now pray they come home safely from a war.

What makes a good Mother anyway? Is it patience? Compassion? Broad hips? The ability to nurse a baby, cook dinner, and sew a button on a shirt, all at the same time? Or is it in her heart? Is it the ache you feel when you watch your son or daughter disappear down the street, walking to school alone for the very first time? The jolt that takes you from sleep to dread, from bed to crib at 2 A.M. to put your hand on the back of a sleeping baby? The panic, years later, that comes again at 2 A. M. when you just want to hear their key in the door and know they are safe again in your home? Or the need to flee from wherever you are and hug your child when you hear news of a fire, a car accident, a child dying?

The emotions of motherhood are universal and so our thoughts are for young mothers stumbling through diaper changes and sleep deprivation... And mature mothers learning to let go.

For working mothers and stay-at-home mothers.

Single mothers and married mothers.

Mothers with money, mothers without.

This is for you all.

For all of us.

Hang in there.

In the end we can only do the best we can.

Tell them every day that we love them.

And pray.

Please pass along to all the Moms in your life.

"Home is what catches you when you fall - and we all fall."

=============================================

Wow. It's things like that that make me really appreciate how hard this whole thing is. I adore my son and I absolutely can not wait to show give him the world.

Random update

It's been longer than I had hoped since I last updated here. I'm beginning to realize how hard it is to keep up with everything I used to enjoy now that Jackson's here. I get maybe 2 hours at a time to try to accomplish anything, which should include cleaning the house, cooking dinner for my adoring husband, or uh... taking a shower. But ya know what? I'm no Renaissance woman. I'd rather screw around on other peoples' blogs or sit on the couch. It's whatever. Let me live my life.

Seriously though, this mom stuff is hard work. We're pretty much on a 3-hour cycle with Jack's day. Wake up, check the diaper, eat, play for about an hour or until he gets grouchy again (the two usually coincide), calm him down and put him back down for a nap. This of course is only the general outline. There's usually one stretch in the morning where he'll be up for upwards of 5 or 6 hours, and occasionally he'll nap for 3 hours. I can't wait to get to the point where he's more predictable and able to sleep for 6 or 8 hours at a time. I miss sleeping at the same time as Dan.

Yeah, we've been working different shifts. I try to go to bed between 10pm and 1am and he goes between 9am and noon. So we see each other for a few hours in the morning and at night. We're doing it this way so that neither of us loses out on sleep. We're both way too used to sleeping for at least 8 hours that the first couple of weeks with Jack sucked since we were still on the same schedule. Why have both of us wake up every 2 hours to figure out why he's crying? Then we both want to kill ourselves the next day. Granted, I still have to wake up every 3 or 4 hours to pump... one of the joys of breast feeding. But it is what it is. It makes me miss the "just us" time even more, but I gotta get over it. We're not going to be "just us" for another 18 years.

Pretty sure last night was the beginning of the 6-week growth spurt. He's been pretty grouchy most of the time he's awake and wants to eat more frequently. Hopefully it'll only last a few days like the 3-week spurt did.

For the last couple of weeks he's been amazing. Smiley and giggly. After he cries for a minute or two after eating, and he calms back down, he likes when I hold him up while he's sitting on my lap so he can look around. He'll usually do it for 5 minutes before he gets tired of holding his head up. It's pretty amazing watching him improve every day at something so simple.

So my other sister is pregnant now! I mentioned before that her twin had her baby 10 days before I had Jack. Now she's something like 6 or 8 weeks pregnant. Basically, they met Jack and realized how epically cute he is and got down to business, if you know what I mean. So 3 cousins all within a year of each other. Nice. I just hope they all like each other.

Alright... it's about time for him to eat... again. Night!

Jack is 5 weeks, 3 days old and we're finally getting used to each other.

Exhaustion...

So Jack is almost 4 weeks old now. In the past couple of days, he's started being awake more often and for longer periods of time... which is awesome, because I'm excited for him to discover the world... but it sucks because I need to take a freakin nap. It's hard trying to figure out how to clean the house, take a shower, get dressed, and eat when I only have about an hour at a time to try to do any of it. He'll nap for an hour then be up for 2. And since Dan has been working the 10pm-7am shift then going to sleep, I can't pawn Jack off on him so I can get things done. So it's mildly frustrating that my house looks like shit and I stink and haven't had make-up on in 3 days.

Also, we discovered the blow dryer trick. Turning on a hair dryer when Jack starts freaking out makes him calm down. It's epic. Couple that with swaddling and a pacifier and while it still takes a while for him to fall back asleep, it gets him to at least stop crying without my having to hold his heavy butt.

Some random relatives of Dan's are coming over tomorrow. They invited themselves. That's nice of them... they must have known that I'm too busy and exhausted to extend the courtesy of inviting virtual strangers into my crappy apartment for the first time, so they just went ahead and told us they were coming over. How thoughtful! Seriously though, I'm over random people wanting to come over. Like, our parents and siblings, okay cool... but grandparents, great-aunts, 2nd cousins... come on. Wait until Christmas like everyone else. I had a mild panic attack the other night thinking about all of these grubby people touching my kid when he's not even a month old yet. And Dan got all mad at me because it's only his family that I'm freaking out about (only because all of my extended family lives 5 hours away and they're waiting until we go out next month, like good relatives). Then I felt kind of bad... but if Jack gets freakin hepatitis or the plague because I let Dan's great-uncle's daughter's best friend's husband hold him, I may just lock the 2 of us in a sterile basement with rationed antibiotics until his first birthday.

Okay... maybe that was a bit of an exaggeration, but still. And shut up.

Anyway, point is that I'm so tired. This new mom stuff is so much harder than anyone led me to believe, and for that, I hate every mom I know. Someone should have warned me 9 months ago that I would want to kill myself during this time.

I just hope the cute, I-can-hold-my-own-weight-up-while-giggling-and-totally-not-screaming phase is coming up soon. I need a break from this 24/7 job.

I'm actually really looking forward to the wedding we're going to in September. It's the 18th, and our 1 year anniversary is the 19th. So while it sucks that we have a family function we're required to appear at the weekend of our anniversary, my dad has been waiting with bated breath to get to babysit so Dan and I can drink and dance with my cousins until the wee morning hours. I can't wait.

We're actually gonna ask Dan's parents if they can babysit just for like, 3 hours next weekend so Dan and I can go out to eat in peace. While I'm still a little apprehensive about leaving Jackson with anyone else because of his ridiculous spaz attacks, every day I'm more and more eager to let them watch him. We need some "us" time, pretty bad.

Alright, I'm gonna go make some lunch while he's passed out. :)

Jackson is 26 days old and I'm in dire need of a nap.